Jan. 14, 2010
Oroville, CA
In an effort to offset the continuing decline of marijuana prices, the Butte County Supervisors have placed a moratorium on so-called "pot dispensaries".
At their regular weekly meeting Tuesday, supervisors finally addressed the issue
of medical marijuana and the effect it is having on the local economy.
"With the prices dropping everywhere around the state," commented lifelong supervisor Jane Dolan, "We knew we had to do something or watch most of the front businesses go out of business."
"I'm glad the Board has finally come to its senses," said a Mexican Mafia official who preferred to remain anonymous, "For a while I was afraid all these sick and crippled hippies were going to take the profit out of illegally growing on public lands. If that happened, we might not be able to fund our meth operations. It could have been a domino effect."
Sheriff J.W. Smith and District Attorney Mike Ramsey see the moratorium as job security.
"There are a lot of organizations that depend on keeping marijuana illegal and the prices high," pointed out Smith, "Law enforcement is no exception. Without the money we get to go after pot growers we wouldn't be able to bust the people who make the money that allows us to go after pot growers."
Ramsey agrees.
"Taxation without representation has been the key to making marijuana work for us. If pot were legalized and regulated we might have more money, but who the hell would we arrest? Violent criminals? Are you crazy? Those people are dangerous."
Ken Blather, whose successful Corning dispensary, Tehama Herbal Collective, has helped save a neighboring ice cream parlor from going under, disagrees with those who say lower pot prices are bad for the economy.
"If people can buy their medical marijuana for a low price they'll have more money left to spend on medical potato chips and medical Star Wars movies. It's the free market at work."
Upon hearing Blather make too much sense, Smith and Ramsey arrested him and threw him in the trunk of the Mexican Mafia guy's car.
Dolan insists that the moratorium is not a ban, but more like a time out that will allow the board to pretend to consider a possible dispensary zoning ordinance before passing a ban.
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