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....Original Northstate Comedy Since 1978....
Xmas to Fall on Dec. 25
95% of men to begin shopping on the 24th.
Although Christmas has been widely advertised as falling on the 25th of December this year, as it does every year, a study published recently in Retail Today suggests that almost all men will begin their Christmas shopping on Dec. 24th. While most women have been shopping, baking, wrapping, writing cards, decorating, and planning since the day after Thanksgiving, men seem to be taken by surprise by Christmas every year.

Ruby Sellers, of Smith Jewelers, spoke to us about the findings of the study. "Oh, sure, I believe it. Every year on Christmas Eve we are swamped! We have many male customers who just walk in the door and hand me their wallets, go to the bar next door for a few hours, then come back and pick up their bags of little velvet boxes. They are just as surprised as their wives on Christmas morning. We see them every year, bless their hearts."

We also asked women on the street about the Christmas shopping habits of the men in their lives. Most of them laughed at us, shaking their heads while wiping the snotty noses of their children. Mrs. Gladys Presley said her husband goes against the grain and is an early shopper. "My Vernon is just great about Christmas. He starts real early, usually around the 22nd of December or so." Elderly WalMart greeter Marge Sargent chimed in, "My husband's dead and my children never call," making everyone uncomfortable.

COMMENT FROM husbandguyinredding:There's still two perfectly good days until Christmas (I'm not counting today--it's too late). What's the problem? This is the type of scare tactics that have become common under Herr Obama and his illegal immigrant administration. I'm sure this study was done by Nancy Pelosi and Hillary Clinton (who are secretly gay married) while they smoked their medical marijuana and figured out yet another way to make men look stoopid.

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